• How to eliminate that most devastating handicap — self doubt
• How to free yourself from worry, stress and resentment
• How to climb above problems to visualize solutions and then attain them
• Simple prayerful exercises that you can do every day, throughout the day, to reinforce your new-found habit of happiness

Now, it’s certainly fine to think positively to focus on positive thoughts. And you do want to overcome the devastation of feeding into anger, fear, and worry. And it certainly is fine to hold onto a “mental picture of yourself as a success” to “practice happy thinking” even every morning to “let pictures of each happy experience you expect to have that day, pass across your mind [to] savor their joy [so that] such thoughts will cause events to turn out that way.”

But unfortunately, there’s a downside to all this happiness.

In recent years, the power of positive thinking has gotten so out of control that if you think negatively or experience negative thoughts you are at fault, need to repent, and avoid ever doing so again. But I’ll let you in on a secret negative thinkers, those advocating positive thoughts are not always positive. They too experience doubt, disappointment, anguish, and pain.

So what’s a poor negative thinker to do?

Well, first of all, let’s take a look at reality.

There is a difference between being positive and negative when dealing with reality. Sure, on the one hand in the long run, you want to be an upbeat and can-do person. But on the other hand, you don’t want to be a perpetual downbeat, can’t-do person. However, if you are generally a positive person and you begin to inordinately experience doubt, fear, worry, anguish and so forth, it’s for a reason. And you need to stop, examine your circumstances and figure out why all this negative stuff is happening and not just block it out with positive thoughts.

What if you are in a job or career that is in dire need of change?

What if you are in a relationship that is falling apart and you need to address the negative issues?

What if you are confronting an individual on a daily basis who is brining you down?

And, more importantly, what if there are deep-seated issues that have been in your psyche since childhood that need to be looked at in detail, confronted, examined, and addressed? It would certainly be foolish to try to just think positive thoughts to overcome here.

Sometimes, being too positive or overly optimistic can be problematic. What if you are a CEO, physician, or general in the field of battle who must deal with the reality of the negative or not so favorable facts? Should the CEO ignore the negative financial reports coming in with positive thoughts? The doctor with a patient who has a life-threatening illness with positive thoughts? The general in the field who is outnumbered with positive thoughts?

OK, not many may be CEO’s, doctors, or generals in the battlefield, but you see my point. However, it is also critical to not avoid those everyday negatives that arise: jealousy, anger, spite, fear, remorse, doubt, hatred, shame, worry, delusion, and so on. Even the generally positive person will have such emotions arise on occasion. And that’s OK. They are there for a reason, warning signals that must be addressed not ignored or glossed over with positive mantras.

At times, self-examination alone is not enough to fix some of the negatives. Depending on the complexity and depth of the issue, you may have to go to a professional. But for lesser issues, and for those who have had some training in doing so, self-examination is enough. For instance, if you are a normally emotionally healthy person and you find yourself all of a sudden becoming jealous of someone’s success, maybe it’s merely a signal that it’s time for a change in your life. Maybe you need to obtain some of that success for yourself.

Now some in the field of motivation and success advocate positive thinking like it’s the only avenue to success. And, sure, you would probably prefer to be a bright, shiny, positive thinker than a dull, downcast, negative one. But you certainly shouldn’t put your work toward success on hold until you become the paragon of positive thinking.

And who knows? maybe you’ll never get rid of the negative? Lincoln didn’t. Here’s a man who often suffered extreme bouts with depression and a fascination with death. But he still achieved within his “negativity.”

And who’s to say negativity is not of an arbitrary nature? For in the United States, someone who is a pushy, get ‘er done, go getter is generally looked at in a positive light. But if you put that same person in certain countries in Asia such actions would be looked at as highly undesirable, maybe even negative.

And who knows? Maybe the reason your negative is that you’re just uninspired and it’s time for change and continued growth. Hell, if you had reached this point and thought “Gee, I’m negative, I’ve got to think happy thoughts” then this would not be considered positive thinking but insanity. It’s not negativity but uninspiring goals that are your problem.

The bottom line here is that being negative is not a death sentence nor is being positive an indicator that all is well. It’s best to be somewhere in between, a realist, and to take an honest look at what is causing you distress or, for that matter, what is causing you happiness and joy. An active, examining, honest mind is your best tool to success and not worrying too much one way or the other how much more positive or negative you “need to be” according to somone’s arbitrary standard.

Here’s to your success.

Need to build a new cabinet under the kitchen sink?

Need to make a career change?

It’s a bedtime story you need?

Have to make an important political decision?

Got an exam you’ve got to pass?

On and on and on it goes. All begins in thought. Everything under the sun began as an imagined reality that eventually came to fruition. Yes, even the sun, the moon and the earth . . . and then some. But what is most sad of all is that critical / creative / intuitive thinking-the most important tool you’ll ever need-is left on the back burner and little touched during one’s formative education years. Most of the time it’s memorize, regurgitate, and purge. Yes, purge-intentionally or through lack of use. Education often overlooks the most important skills we can learn to focus almost exclusively on content. It’s like an artist knowing color, shape, and form but not having the heart and vision to do anything more than copy what she sees.

How sad.

But there’s hope.

Let’s begin that hope by focusing on critical thinking first. What is it? When I told a friend of mine that I teach critical thinking, he asked, “What’s that?” I told him, “I teach people how to think.” He laughed, “What’s there to thinking?” A lot, actually, much more than most believe-a testament to our educational system’s lack. But that’s not the focus of this article. Let’s get into the thinking, shall we?

Critical Thinking: Three Part Model

Reasoning: Foundation of Critical Thinking

Critical thinking is technically defined as the ability to come to a conclusion based on one or more arguments. Here arguments are not Jerry Springer Show, chair over the head smack downs, but rather a discussion: “The aim of argument, or of discussion, should not be victory, but progress” Joseph Joubert.

Arguments typically persuade (persuasion, argument’s cousin) with good, clear reasoning. They are sound logically and the evidence that supports them is reasonable, and in most cases, good arguments have evidence that is more reasonable than those that support other, lesser arguments. For example, if I told you that all conspiracy theories are true because Dr. Thompson of Quack University said so, you would know my evidence is not sound or reasonable. One, because making an absolute statement (as in “always” “never” “all”) is often incorrect. Very little is always or never true. And you would know that I’m making a generalization based on limited support. We’ve also got a hasty conclusion here (picking one conclusion when others are possible). I would probably need to bring in other experts to concur as well as some research and data to solidify my argument.

Assumptions:

Often these are lying underneath the argument going unnoticed and unmentioned. For example, if someone says “Every parent needs to be responsible for their child’s education,” how many would pick up on the fact that this person is conservative? If someone states that “Nuclear energy is not a viable source of alternative energy,” how many would pick up on the fact that this person has come forward because there are plans in the near future to build a nuclear reactor in his back yard. And so on. In arguments I teach that there are two levels of thought: one, the one you are arguing on, and two, the counter argument or refutation that looks to take down or invalidate your argument.

Logical Fallacies:

These are some of the most common and pernicious aspects of arguments. These are basically tricks or misdirection in thinking, getting people off the topic or issue at hand to distract attention elsewhere. These happen unintentionally but intentionally as well, for there are those who don’t have a sound argument and try to get you not to notice by distraction. Now, a few of the more popular fallacies:

Ad hominem: a personal attack. During Clinton’s campaign, many attempted to attack his character not his track record as a two-term governor of Arkansas-where he had very solid political record.

Red herring: or getting someone off the trail by distracting with an unrelated issue. For example, “I’m going to grade this test on a curve because it creates a better relationship between student and teacher.” Wrong! The issue at hand here is not “student / teacher relations” but rather the student’s education.

Either or thinking: “Either you’re for our troops in Iraq or you’re not.” Often this is to get people to kowtow to one’s desires. It is lazy or abusive thinking. There are often grey areas that which people who use this fallacy don’t want to deal with.

There are many more fallacies, but I think you get the point.

There’s quite a bit more to critical thinking than I can talk about in this one article, but there are a few other points that need to be addressed before we can move on. First, a good critical thinker admits that she doesn’t know. As I state to my students and clients “We are all equal in our infinite ignorance.” What we don’t know is quite a bit more than we’ll ever know. Not sure about this? I tell my students that if they think they know a lot, go into any large library, stand in the middle of the middle floor and regurgitate on cue every word in every volume. OK, begin. How far did you get? There, I told you so.

That’s why with complex issues, like health reform, illegal immigration, and global warming, you may want to take considerable time before you arrive at a solid argument. Personally, regarding illegal immigration it took me several years of researching, listening to immigration stories from those who have been there, writing several articles and observing the responses before I reached a well-thought out conclusion as to the main cause for this issue being an emotional hot-button. And I discovered that it is not based in fact but rather emotional reaction to race.

And there’s another point to consider: emotion. When we deal with arguments emotion is not only frequently attached but hard-coded embedded. Often it breaks down to an emotional sword fight (“Hey, that’s MY’ argument you’re dis-ing here!”) more than a logical one. To argue best, one must work at detaching from one’s emotions. Certainly easier said than done, for I’ve certainly failed on occasion even being quite aware of this foible, but it needs to be mastered to argue from a solid position. No one’s perfect, but we’re not looking for perfection, remember, but a moving forward.

So some things to think about regarding critical thinking: admit you don’t know; you have emotional buttons that can be pushed; there is often great complexity in issues; you need to research and verify complex arguments.

Bottom line, critical thinking is key in making any important decision be it personal, local, national, or otherwise.

Creative Thinking:

OK, let’s get this out of the way right off the bat. If you’re thinking creativity is beyond your grasp or interest that it’s only for artists or those “creative types” think again. Consider the following:

The creative sector of the U.S. economy accounts for $1.7 trillion per year, nearly half of all wages and salaries. So if you think creativity equals art and art is simply the candy store of the economic sector, think again. Not that creativity is all about making money, no. But many do have a false understanding of the important role creativity not only plays in our lives economically, but intellectually and spiritually. It is an all encompassing, multi- faceted tool.

Who are these “creative” people in the economic sector? They are artists, designers, writers, analysts, musicians, entrepreneurs, inventors, scientists, engineers, and so on.

What type of mind set is required to be “creative”? Open minded, flexible, forward-looking, innovative, tolerant, experimental, hopeful, all that one needs to create.

Let’s take a look at the field of science as an example. Specifically, let’s look at physicists or those attempting to come up with a theory that ties quantum with relativity to discover the mind of God or why we are here, where we came from, and where we are going. For it is this theory, or string theory, when found will allegedly, according to some scientists, tie the two aforementioned theories together and we will, according to Stephen Hawking, discover the mind of God.

Now in order to work with this theory one certainly needs all the attributes mentioned above and more. Patience certainly needs to be involved as well, for according to scientist there are so many possible outcomes or answers that the theory is not even right. Huh? Well, that’s where an open, flexible, forward-looking, innovative, tolerant, hopeful mind comes into play. You can see the merit of all these characteristics alone or existing outside creativity. In order to be successful in career and in life one needs these attributes, so it’s no accident that they are so valuable and of such great merit to our emotional, intellectual, spiritual, and financial well being.

A point of practical note is that many employers complain that new hires often lack a creative ability to use the right-side of the brain to problem solve solo or in teams. This supports the point I made earlier about most high school and college grads lacking critical, creative, intuitive thinking skills, those skills that are little paid attention to by educators.

But how exactly does one go about being creative?

Practice, of course. You have to get back to being a child, those kids who say the craziest things. In the 40s, 50s and 60s the show, Art Linkletter’s House Party ran a segment called Kids Say the Darndest Things. Bill Cosby revived a version of the show in the 90s. You can see its popularity. But why?

Well, kids are cute, of course. But they are funny and damn creative. Once while talking to a friend of mine, her five-year-old daughter out of the blue asked, “Mom, when I die, will I dream of dinosaurs?” We all have the ability to think creatively to think as a child, but we have to practice being open enough and feeling safe enough to make odd connections to be flexible, tolerant and open minded. It is here and only here where one can create. And in this day and age of the consultant, the entrepreneur, the recommendation age, according to Glen Dietzel, one more than ever needs to create and be creative. With the economy being so turbulent just relying on a single source of income or job is suicide. Now more than ever one needs to branch out to secure multiple sources of income so that when one stream dries up in these turbulent time there are others to replace them. And it is here where creative, critical, intuitive thinking is vital to one’s survival.

Intuitive Thinking:

This is knowledge or belief obtained neither by reason nor perception, creativity’s cousin. It is based in instinct, a gut feeling and not one based in thorough, in depth analysis and research. It is a hunch or unjustified belief. But according to many it is one of the most important skills to the successful in any venture.

Consider the following, Dr. Mohammed Abdulla El-Erian, CEO and co-CIO of PIMCO, the world’s largest bond investor over US$1 trillion in assets, speaks to the importance of intuition. In his book, When Markets Collides, he mentions that while training as a stock broker, he was working with a very talented young man. As far as his ability is concerned, he was certainly book smart; however, according to El-Erian he was exceptional because of his intuitive insights. El Erian goes on to speak of the great importance of this acquired skill in analyzing the stock market that it is a skill the best master.

Enough from me, let’s cut to the chase by hearing what others have to say about the importance of intuition:

“All perceiving is also thinking all reasoning is also intuition, all observation is also invention” Rudolf Arnheim

“An absolute can only be given in an intuition, while all the rest has to do with analysis” Henri Bergson

“Cease trying to work everything out with your minds. It will get you nowhere. Live by intuition and inspiration and let your whole life be Revelation” Eileen Caddy

“Good design begins with honesty, asks tough questions, comes from collaboration and from trusting your intuition” Freeman Thomas

“Intuition becomes increasingly valuable in the new information society precisely because there is so much data” John Naisbitt

“All human knowledge thus begins with intuitions, proceeds thence to concepts, and ends with ideas” Immanuel Kant

“Trust your hunches. They’re usually based on facts filed away just below the conscious level” Joyce Brothers

“If the single man plant himself indomitably on his instincts, and there abide, the huge world will come round to him” Ralph Waldo Emerson

“For whereas the mind works in possibilities, the intuitions work in actualities, and what you intuitively desire, that is possible to you. Whereas what you mentally or “consciously” desire is nine times out of ten impossible; hitch your wagon to a star, or you will just stay where you are” D H Lawrence

“Knowledge has three degrees-opinion, science, illumination. The means or instrument of the first is sense; of the second, dialectic; of the third, intuition” Plontinus

“The only real valuable thing is intuition” Albert Einstein

And on Mr. Einstein’s note I end.

So putting it all together, you can’t have one without the other: critical, creative, and intuitive thinking. Creative thinking is about coming up with possibilities. Critical thinking sets the mind to discipline and accuracy. And then when our efforts are exhausted and infinite ignorance takes precedence, it is our invaluable friend intuition, the “only real valuable thing” that makes things absolute.

Develop it. Trust in it. With work, discipline, and faith it will not lead you astray. My rational mind has failed me, but the trumping power of intuition never does. Rely on it for its vision is absolute. But trust not, faith not, it will run from you as quickly as the wild wind.

Here’s to your success.

And therein lies the strength of the power of self-control. In this day-n-age of express-yourself-no-fear-me-firtism, it is difficult if not impossible to get this concept over to people of such a mindset. But self-control is at the root of the establishment of this country. Even in our anthem “America the Beautiful” we here these prophetic words:

But we have not maintained this ideal and it has hurt us as a nation and individually. It is something that has been spoken to again and again over the decades since establishment. Here’s a current message from the pastoral staff at Westminster Presbyterian Church in Medford Oregon that speaks to this verse:

Because of this lack of self-control, even our courts have been affected by it in setting precedents that enable the uncontrolled. In one case, a 79-year-old woman burned herself with coffee that was bought at McDonalds and was awarded $640,000. Applying the principles of comparative negligence, the jury found that McDonald’s was 80% responsible for the incident and the woman was 20% at fault. Though there was a warning on the coffee cup, the jury decided that the warning was neither large enough nor sufficient [emphasis added]. In looking at the statement emphasized, one can see by this precedent where our country is headed. Most would know or be accountable or responsible enough to know that the coffee was hot whether it was 190 degrees (the actual temperature) or 140 degrees (the proposed temperature) and could cause serious pain if not serious burning.

Never before have cases of a similar nature been heard in such great numbers. Now, because of a systemic lack of accountability stemming from a lack of self-control or that which requires one to be “exercising the discipline” thereof, we have more and more become a nation of finger pointers, and those fingers very rarely if ever point backwards.

In the field of self-improvement or self-help, one often hears of overcoming weaknesses and shortcomings. Offense is a big one. Certainly we can all become offended. But the point here is that if you are too easily offended, you will spend a great majority of your time heading nowhere or, worse yet, going backwards as you spin your wheels in anger, resentment, revenge, and spite for those who have done you wrong.

There are different ways in which one may be attacked. Someone could slander or liable your good name, but if your name is good, what’s to worry? Time and time and time again, we find those who speak the loudest about the ills of others eventually shoot themselves down. I can think of two well-known performers whose act was built on attacking the character of others: Dice Clay and Joan Rivers. Their popularity was short lived. This mindset is not healthy to the individual purporting it or to those on the receiving end. It creates much more harm than good in any situation.

I can tell you of several personal experiences where people who desired to besmirch my name were not able to do so only to have it backfire because the people involved knew me or found out who was actually culpable.

If you want to do something with your life, if you want greater self confidence, less anxiety, and greater spirituality, if you want to do good for yourself and others, if you want to move ahead you need to solidify your character to build self confidence and self esteem by not letting others take cheap shots to take you down, waste your time or hold you back from growth and the opportunity to help not only yourself but others to a greater and greater degree as you overcome weaknesses. If you work on yourself, helping yourself to be good, to do good, to help others, to come to the aid of others, to lift and support others, you will create such a solid footing for yourself that those who take shots will not be able to take you down.

“I am rubber, you are glue. Whatever you say bounces off me and sticks to you.”

It may appear childish, but this motivational phrase actually works well at helping the child build self confidence to know that the source of the bad is not in her and that she is good, but most importantly, that the good in her will shine on to aid her in overcoming challenges or the negative and bad that will stick and stain and drain her of life if she believes in the insult, the lie coming her way. This is certainly not where any of us desire to be: young to old.

In order to not be offended, the majority of the work has to be done on your part. You certainly have to build yourself up in the manor suggested above, but it also takes a concerted personal mental effort to overcome the habit of emotionally attacking the offender as well. We have to think before we act. Emotions are not thoughts, they are habits put in place by years of poor or inadequate thinking / reasoning or even its complete lack. This poor reasoning must be undone by good, healthy productive reasoning, for in most cases if not all these bad habits will persist until we consciously intervene.

We can also seek the help of others by informing family and friends of our new mindset. By doing so, we not only bring them to our aid in overcoming bad habits but we help them to overcome them as well.

May you seek the good, the productive, the positive in all that you do in seeking greater self improvement, personal development and self worth. We are not here seeking perfection, nor should anyone believe that we can go throughout life without being offended, for we all have our weak moments, even the strongest. But we must desire to not find offense, to have the negative bounce off us the majority of time; therefore, we can only get stronger for ourselves and, even more importantly, for the many brothers and sisters who need lifting and strengthening. By doing all that is suggested here, you will gain confidence and improvement through these simple self-help techniques.

Personal growth and development are ongoing and never-ending. Until you’ve perfected yourself, you need to grow. Overcoming the self by making the self bigger than your problem or offender will motivate you, and through this motivation, this self improvement, this overcoming, you will gain greater and greater personal strength and desire to reach out to others to do the same for them. Strength breeding strength breeding strength breeding strength. May the line never be broken.

Let’s begin by dispelling the myth that teachers (for now let’s talk primary and secondary) are all that and a bag of chips. Teachers are not only given too much credit, they are given too much of the blame. Currently, the move is toward greater teacher accountability for student outcomes based on assessment criteria. What’s all that arcane jargon mean? Simply that teachers are to a greater and greater degree being held responsible for students’ grades. That, my friend, is a good one. Almost as funny as the one where a minister, priest and rabbi walk into a bar . . . OK, forget the joke, let me explain.

To a great degree, teachers (k through 12) have a workload that even the toughest laborer would bend and break under. They not only have to prepare lessons, attend meetings (teacher, administrative, parent), and have a life-if they can fit it in-they have a workload that has them averaging 57 hours worked per week ¹. On top of that, consider that working as a teacher is stressful because there is no time to relax. As a teacher, you are in charge of teaching, policing, cajoling, organizing, coaching, motivating, disciplining, and so on. From start to finish of the school day there is little time to relax, and you are working at full sensory capacity most of the time. That is why there is such great teacher burn out. You have very little time to kick back and recede into yourself (like a desk jockey or cubical cubby). So, on top of all this, teachers are now to be responsible for chasing 100 to 200 students to make sure they are doing their homework and are learning what they need to learn. Good luck.

But consider that there are other factors now that weaken the teacher physically, emotionally, and authoritatively. It is the last item I desire to focus on here. Students and parents, to a great degree, have sapped the teacher’s strength as the authoritative figure, one of the reasons why 3 out of 5 teachers now entering the field (K through 12) look at teaching as a stepping stone. I have a lawyer friend who did just that.

When he began teaching, he was told by a grizzled veteran that “you will either give into the student’s demands or you will quit.” To cite an example of this loss of control, at a general assembly a student was acting up. My friend told the student, who was not his, to settle down. The student challenged him and said, “I don’t care. You can even call the police. Nothing’s going to happen to me.” Another friend, a fellow classmate in graduate school, told me she was no longer a high school teacher because after 13 years her authority in the classroom had nearly vanished. Add to this parents who no longer, to a great degree, support teachers. Many a parent, if their child receives a bad grade, places the blame entirely on the teacher, the student getting off scot-free.

Teachers are not, should not, or ever be seen as the main educators, motivators, keepers of their students or children. Children? What does that word naturally imply? Of course, parents. It is the parents’ responsibility to make sure that their children are doing their homework and doing it well, getting off the couch and being the teachers they should be.

I have numerous friends who have taken back the teaching of their children by home teaching. An issue of much discussion, but I mention it here to show how the problems of the K-12 school system has gotten so out of control that parents are taking the issue into their own hands. Many parents have discovered that the education system is failing and is not preparing their children for the work-a-day world. This is an issue in and of itself, not to be gone into detail here, however.

But what is the role of the parent even if he or she decides not to home school?

It is essential that parents not only teach academics (meaning, bare minimum checking homework) but other vitally important issues of concern, concerns that last a lifetime beyond all the math, science, history, and English that is all too soon forgotten. A few things that should exist on that list are a work ethic, accountability, patience, perseverance, manors / respect for authority, cooperation, tolerance for difference, sacrifice, charity, humility, and more. If these things were taught by parents, as they should be, perhaps the number of problems we now face in school and society would be reduced.

Continuing with the issue of educational necessity and change, I’d like to propose an academic overhaul. This issue is quit complex and something I go into greater depth in my upcoming book Education is a Waste of Time, but I’d like to touch on a few points here.

Consider that in 24 hours we forget 80% of what we read if we don’t review, and even more so if we don’t pay attention, have acquired the skill of better retention, and, most importantly, don’t care, how much does our no-student-left-behind retain? Well, according to my eight-plus years of teaching, mostly at the college level, and concurring statistical evidence, less than 1/3 of all students entering college have sufficient math, reading, and writing skills. The key word here is “sufficient.” Considering that there is a push for more math and science majors to keep up with the 6 countries that produce students that exceed our student’s preparedness, it appears we don’t have much hope. Even though the push for students is ill-founded because of the small number of existing careers that require high level math skills, the numbers do not bode well.

Taking all this into consideration, how important is it that we teach our students specific, locked in studies: math, science, history, English, and so on. I often will address this point by asking my students to regurgitate on queue, from the first minute to last, all that they learned in a class that day before coming to my class. Most if not all come up completely empty handed. One thing we don’t teach or inspire our students to do is to pay attention and acquire skills that will aid in focusing on key material and being able to recall it. Where is that class in high school? We merely throw it at ‘em and hope it sticks.

Something else we’ve forgotten to do, like any good marketer in the business world know, is to simply ask. What has happened to our empowered, “no-student-left-behind” student? The overly liberal shift of power from teacher to student is being wasted if we don’t ask the empowered what they want? And if they don’t know, well, now that they’ve been given the power, they by all means should work on it. Many a parent, teacher, administrator will say, “Well, they’re children. They aren’t mature enough to know.” Well, if we don’t ask them we’ll never know. And we shouldn’t just ask them once, for they are developing and changing rapidly at this time. How ‘bout this. We ask ‘em often and we ask ‘em early. Consider the following. Please bare with me.

On average, 1 in 10,000 has perfect musical pitch. In many Asian countries, where pitch determines meaning (i.e.: going up at the end of a word means one thing, down another) 1 in 100 has perfect pitch. My point? Practice. If we get students thinking early and often what they want to do with their life, and more know than not, then that’s where they need to focus and not struggling, spending a majority of their time in classes they don’t care about, aren’t motivated to participate in, and bottom line, will end up wasting a lot of time in. Consider this, within ten years, 70% of college grads will be working in fields they were not educated in (regarding personal acquaintances, that number is low). And considering that many employers now only use a college degree as a dividing line (a way of weeding out candidates with less potential), why not get a degree in something you love? Don’t waste those four years.

There is a lot more to this topic, such as incorporating financial classes, inter-personal skills classes, success classes, and so on, but our K through 16 system is in serious need of repair and upgrading. And this must be done now before too much time passes and more time, money, and effort is wasted. I know that this magnitude of change is challenging but its essential and critical to the long-term welfare of our children; nevertheless, it is a goal or target that we have to shoot for. We have no alternative, remembering that it is not perfection that we seek but betterment.

¹ Teacher’s Workloads Diary Survey, BMRB Social Research, Sept. 2006

“There’s always room for improvement, you know–it’s the biggest room in the house.”– Louise Heath Leber

Everyone has to overcome shortcomings or weaknesses to achieve greater happiness. Maybe you’re too easily angered; an excessive procrastinator; you don’t follow through on commitments; are socially inept or can’t relate to people well enough to maintain relationships, a job, or family; can’t commit; can’t finish what you started; you have addictions to alcohol, drugs, video games, collecting, sports, pornography, or any avoidance behavior, on and on and on.

But to overcome weaknesses is difficult. It’s much easier to ignore them or say “Well, that’s just me. That’s who I am.” You can overcome the majority of your major weaknesses or character flaws, but it takes a lot of work and honesty.

“How desperately difficult it is to be honest with oneself. It is much easier to be honest with other people.”– Edward White Benson

“I count him braver who overcomes his desires than him who conquers his enemies; for the hardest victory is the victory over self.”- Aristotle

“Everyone needs to twelve-step their lives. Don’t simply wait until you’ve got an addiction.” Anonymous

“Procrastination is the fear of success. People procrastinate because they are afraid of the success that they know will result if they move ahead now. Because success is heavy, carries a responsibility with it, it is much easier to procrastinate and live on the “someday I’ll” philosophy.”– Denis Waitley

It is too easy to stay with the status quo. Too easy to put off for tomorrow what will never happen today or ever. But weaknesses must be addressed, for many if not all of these weaknesses are life killers. Life killers in the sense that you deny yourself a greater happiness and joy by not fixing or working on them enough to make significant inroads. Life killers in the sense that you are not only denying yourself but others the benefit of what you have to offer. Bottom line, the more you fix you weaknesses the greater happiness, confidence, and peace of mind you achieve. The greater you achieve in these areas the greater you will achieve in the areas of financial gain, personal satisfaction, and desire to reach out to others. But there is a lot of sacrifice and effort involved. No fast-food, get-rich, learn-it-in-one-day schemes here.

“In order to live free and happily you must sacrifice boredom. It is not always an easy sacrifice.”– Richard Bach

“Self-esteem must be earned! When you dare to dream, dare to follow that dream, dare to suffer through the pain, sacrifice, self-doubts, and friction from the world, you will genuinely impress yourself.”– Dr. Laura Schlessinger

But growth requires getting out of one’s comfort zone and to not only do the difficult but to do the unimaginable. If you are poor of spirit, poor of mind, poor of soul, poor of influence, poor in pocket and poor of experience, you are the only one to blame. Time and time and time and time again I have heard directly and indirectly of the uber-successful their failures: Tony Robbins eating once a day and washing his dishes in the bathtub; Og Mandino, the greatest salesman on earth, losing his family, turning to drink and living on the streets; Dr. Joe Vital living in poverty for over a decade in Dallas, Texas. The many billionaires, millionaires, and lesser-aires all coming from less-than-nothing to rise through the refining fire of dire straits and circumstance having their mortal coil of clay shaped, strengthened and sanctified to not only the betterment of self but to the betterment of the hundreds, thousands, millions they’ve touched.

How many do you want to touch?

If you think you can’t touch many, think again, for in desiring a lesser life, you snuff out the God-given potential to rise and affect the masses, the many, the always and many who need you to overcome yourself for their betterment, a hand lent, a hand reaching down to lift up, only up.

“Great minds have purposes; little minds have wishes. Little minds are subdued by misfortunes; great minds rise above them.”– Washington Irving

“Your work is to discover your world and then with all your heart give yourself to it.”– The Buddha

“As you grow older, you’ll discover that you have two hands: One for helping yourself, the second for helping others.”- Unknown

But you need to address fear, overcome the self, the self-limiting desire to be comfortable and remain. Only in the remaining do we find despair and lack of hope. It is in the quick not the dead that we find purpose, hope, joy, and desire to touch the masses. The dynamic is in action, growth, it is where life is sanctified and made of great purpose, indeed.

“Only when you’ve worked on yourself long enough can you be of great worth to others. Don’t be selfish by doing nothing, build yourself to the benefit of others.”– Jeffrey P. Brown

“Our lives improve only when we take chances — and the first and most difficult risk we can take is to be honest with ourselves.”– Walter Anderson

“If you stand up and be counted, from time to time you may get yourself knocked down. But remember this: A man flattened by an opponent can get up again. A man flattened by conformity stays down for good.”– Thomas J. Watson, Jr.

“It all comes down to one very simple choice… Get busy livin’ or get busy dyin’.”– Andy Dufrain, “The Shawshank Redemption”

“Far better to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs, even though checkered by failure, than to take rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy much nor suffer much, because they live in the gray twilight that knows not victory, nor defeat.”– Theodore Roosevelt

“Take chances, make mistakes. That’s how you grow. Pain nourishes your courage. You have to fail in order to practice being brave.”– Mary Tyler Moore

“Why not go out on a limb? Isn’t that where the fruit is?”– Frank Scully

“A ship in harbor is safe, But that is not what ships are built for.”- unknown

“Behold the turtle. He makes progress only when he sticks his neck out.”– James B. Conant

“If everything seems under control, you’re just not going fast enough.”– Mario Andretti

But in order to do well, in order to find your dream, lock your hands about its neck so it doesn’t slip away, focus and dedication is required. You need to be ruthless in taking massive action on a consistent, persistent basis, with your eyes on the prize which resides above the horizon within the great heights of the stars. Work, sacrifice, and boldness of action are not only those things that success are made of but happiness, greatest fulfillment, and joy. Do this and leave mediocrity and your half-empty life behind for those of a lesser heart. You, my friend, have great things to do.

“Don’t ask yourself what the world needs; ask yourself what makes you come alive. And then go and do that. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.”– Harold Whitman

“Most people are so busy knocking themselves out trying to do everything they think they should do, they never get around to what they want to do.”– Kathleen Winsor

“You’ve achieved success in your field when you don’t know whether what you are doing is work or play.”– Warren Beatty

“Lack of will power has caused more failure than lack of intelligence or ability.”– Flower A. Newhouse

“I never could have done what I have done without the habits of punctuality, order, and diligence, without the determination to concentrate myself on one subject at a time.”– Charles Dickens

“We don’t know who we are until we see what we can do.”– Martha Grimes

“The minute you settle for less than you deserve, you get even less than you settled for.”– Maureen Dowd

You need to build yourself, build your character by not only overcoming weaknesses but finding you strength. For in the monetized world, business coaches speak to building one’s strengths for greater success. Michael Jordan succeeded in basketball and failed at baseball. Einstein succeeded as a theoretical physicist not as a salesman, which he almost became. Certainly to monetize one needs to focus on strengths. But the underlying weaknesses-the many I mentioned above and more-will tear at the foundation of one’s being, and ultimately success, faster than anything else.

“Whenever anyone has offended me, I try to raise my soul so high that the offense cannot reach it.”– Rene Descartes

“How do you know when you’ve built great character? When you can no longer be offended.” Jeffrey P. Brown

“When there is no enemy within, the enemies outside cannot hurt you.”– African proverb

“With confidence you can reach truly amazing heights; without confidence, even the simplest accomplishments are beyond your grasp.”– Jim Loehr

“Talk to yourself every morning. By looking into those eyes, she or he will tell you everything you need to know. That is, if you’re brave enough to go there.” Jeffrey P. Brown

“The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.”– Joan Didion

“Success is not to be pursued; it is to be attracted by the person we become.”– Jim Rohn

This is the age of the entrepreneur, not only for the sake of independence but out of economic necessity. The standard job (just beyond broke) no longer provides for the American dream. Many are losing their homes and their lives along with it. With the death of pensions, social security, and job security (experts estimate employees entering the job market will have upwards of ten career changes before retirement), people as never before are reliant upon themselves to not only provide for the here and now but the retirement of later. And the majority are woefully ill-prepared for the after-job life, most not waking to the calamity of the lack of preparation well into retirement when it is way too late.

Therefore, since so much is reliant upon the individual, it has never been more important to make that individual strong-and that’s YOU. You must overcome your fear of failure, procrastination, being embarrassed, hurt, risk, of even happiness-yes, the fear of success itself-to obtain your ultimate goal. The you you will discover and become as you chip away at the old you to find the wonder, purpose, and potential that lives deep within us all.

God bless.

“Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful.”– Herman Cain

“To live a creative life, we must lose our fear of being wrong.”– Joseph Chilton Pearce

“If you’re not failing every now and again, it’s a sign you’re not doing anything very innovative.”– Woody Allen

“However well organized the foundations of life may be, life must always be full of risks.”– Havelock Ellis

“If you’re not making mistakes, you’re not taking risks, and that means you’re not going anywhere. The key is to make mistakes faster than the competition, so you have more changes to learn and win.”– John W. Holt, Jr.

“If you are never scared, embarrassed, or hurt, it means you never take chances.”– Julia Soul

“Progress always involves risk; you can’t steal second base and keep your foot on first.”– Frederick Wilcox

“A failure is like fertilizer; it stinks to be sure, but it makes things grow faster in the future.”– Dennis Waitley

What does that mean?

For a few examples, let’s go back in time.

At the founding of this country, certain groups of people were seen as savage, weak, untrustworthy, childish, and so forth. And they were relegated to second class status or lower. Just as in some cultures, Hindu for example, certain worth is arbitrarily assigned. If you were born to a wealthy mother and father, you were seen superior to everyone else, even if you were the nastiest person on earth. Conversely, you could be a virtual saint, the nicest person ever to live, but if you were poor your life was seen as holding little value.

And at times, these arbitrary standards or beliefs can be seen getting shot out of the water by great events, maybe a lesson from a greater power? For example, as I alluded to above, during the early years of this country, people felt blacks we’re inferior, for all the reasons mentioned above. And that’s why when they finally we’re able to fight in the Civil War, more officers we’re assigned to black regiments than to white. White officers felt that the black soldiers needed more supervision because they were more like children than men.

However, a strange thing happened and actually contributed to the war coming to an end. As black soldiers fought, white soldiers stood in amazement-especially Southern whites-as blacks not only fought with intelligence but bravery and honor. Southern whites began to see their “arbitrary” perception of blacks come crumbling down about their collective heads. Many Southerners began to loose faith in the cause. It was their fear and weakness that caused them to perceive blacks incorrectly that which could no longer stand in the light of the reality of war.

For another example, consider that prior to the late 1800s in the United States, women were seen as chattel or property of the man. There was even one case where a woman shot a policeman who came to her door and the husband took the blame because women weren’t seen as creatures that could think for themselves. Since the husband told his wife to shoot anyone who came to the door while he was away, her shooting the policeman was found not to be her fault. Besides, at that time women we’re not asked to make any decisions beyond that of what to cook and clean on any given day. Once again, “arbitrary” standards put forth by a group that merely magnifies weakness and fear.

Little has changed today. The issues may have changed, but to a great degree, arbitrary opinion and mores rule the day.

Case in point, a phrase from yesteryear that is still thrown around today: “a penny saved is a penny earned.” Is it? Should we all be saving? Today, some say savers are losers because the gold standard hasn’t been used since 1971, thus, the value of the dollar has declined considerably. If you look at what it takes to afford the essentials today (home, car(s), insurances, etc.) the truth of this point becomes evident. Also consider that the savings rate

has dropped from as high as 11 to 12 percent in the mid-eighties to an average of 1 percent since 2000.

Then there’s the myth of education, my last example. Here we hear such phrases as “No child left behind,” “Education leads to a better world,” “Education provides the American dream.” And so forth and so on. But an education does not ensure employment, a sufficient wage to capture the American dream, guarantee intelligence, or an individual who thinks logically, critically, moral, or just. Many an educated person has proven to be unjust and poor in his / her thinking. But there’s more.

Today, what is not being told to our incoming college freshmen is that there’s a change in the weather. Along with the economic changes mentioned above, companies outsourcing, downsizing, the greater globalization of world markets–as well as other factors–are not being explained to college students who seek careers, careers that many believe will provide more for them than just the great struggle that is certainly ahead.

But these lies or mis-truths and omissions are being perpetuated by the few who benefit, those who are not adversely affected, so why should they care? Because of this they are not talking and too many students, young people, walk into traps that take them years if not a decade or more to recover from.

But bottom line is that in order to be successful, first, you have to go deep to see what is really there. Do your homework. Don’t rely on existing popular notions, especially in rapidly changing world.

Many may say about education “If it ain’t broke, why fix it?” But that’s not the issue. What they mean to say is “Why fix it if in revealing the truth it will not line my pockets?” In most cases, if it’s not a money maker there’s no impetus for change. And education is not a big money maker. It’s more of a money drainer. Even though many pay lip service to it, going back 20 years of more (Bush Sr. the “education president”), if America wants to get it done, it gets it done. Little has been done regarding education reform.

So what are the issues that may not be fixed or spoken of that will trip you up? Here’s a few.

Few speak to the outmoded nature of colleges and universities-cumbersome vehicles that aren’t designed to keep up with the need to rapidly train a workforce made of individuals who may have three to five and as many as ten career changes; or to the misguided notion that teachers are greatly responsible for educating our youth while the brunt of the work should fall on the parent’s shoulders (specifically in secondary schools); that very few students entering colleges or job factories understand the dire need to think as entrepreneurs in a day n age of downsizing, outsourcing, temps and contractors, and a rapidly changing global job market; that once enough experience is gained our college grads must increase their financial IQ to move into being business owners (1 in 6 Americans now are) and active investors as insurance against dying pensions and social security fund. And so much more.

These are only a few issues that are not being taught, that is not common knowledge that could result in years of lost time and money left on the table. Many of the establishment have opinions about these issues that no longer hold true, not updating notions that may have been valid twenty years ago or more, but do not hold true today. They hold onto failed thinking like a child to his mother his first day at school.

More than ever before, we as individuals are responsible for ensuring that we are adaptable, flexible, and informed when it come to our educational, financial, social and political welfare. No longer can we rely on institutions-schools, colleges, government, employers-to provide. As the title of Alan Greenspan’s new book states, we are in The Age of Turbulence. And there is much work to be done.