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Loss, Suffering, and Sorrow: Time for Gaining Strength and Insight

So you’ve hit bottom. You’ve tried everything and worked yourself to the bone trying to make things right. But no matter what you just can’t get off the ground. You’re stuck. So let’s talk about it because few will.

There’s so much talk out there today about being positive that people forget that being sad and despondent is okay and a part of life. Modern society has glossed over and hidden a lot of what used to be dealt with upfront; for example, the dying did so at home while the family gathered around supporting and caring, not leaving the final rite of passage to a disconnected staff at some foreign location with just a job to do.

But how do you handle difficult times? Finding out how to do so is certainly a critical part of everyone’s life-education or soft skills that few if any ever even begin to understand never mind master. An oft neglected skill that all cannot afford to go without.

So you’ve been doing everything in your power over an extended period of time to find a job, get your business off the ground, get that lost child back on track, or to aid a dying relative but you just can’t go on, so what do you do? Here’s some suggestions:

1. First, stop struggling. Yes, give up and let go. If you just keep forging ahead, at a certain point you’re just spinning your wheels. You need to stop, take a break, take some time off, get away or whatever you feel is necessary but you do need to first and foremost stop.’ Since you’re not getting anywhere, you certainly need to forge a new perspective or understanding or at least rest for a while. Also, how do you expect to get any help if you keep flapping about? There could be rescue or relief just out of reach that can give you a hand, maybe even save your life.

2. Second, get quiet. Of course, just like stopping during times of struggle, getting quite is just as challenging. But it is strictly at these times when it is most important to listen for a solution. In one case, a woman struggling with her child’s medical problem just couldn’t find help anywhere: family, friends, counselors, or physicians. So she turned to her non-judgmental paper and pen and turned to her wisdom within. She said that it was the only place she was able to find the insight and solution to her problem. But the key is that she remained calm enough to seek a solution. Once again, tough to do, but the point is that you don’t have a choice.

3. Third, get it out. At some point you’re just going to have to let it out: a good shout, scream, cry, kick, whatever you need. Just make sure the kids aren’t home and the neighbor’s don’t overhear the commotion and call the cops. You’ll probably need to vent, but don’t let it go too far. At some point the venting merely turns on itself and feeds the misery. Get it out and then let it pass. As the old saying goes, for every dark cloud there’s a silver lining. We all have to go through trials, and the more you understand and go through them successfully the more you strengthen the spirit to overcome the weaker body / mind.

4. Fourth, keep it to yourself. Don’t go sharing your misery with every person who comes along. Best to keep it amongst an intimate few. Even the most giving people feel helpless and will attempt to avoid you more out of a sense of helplessness than merely to avoid seeing you suffer.

5. Fifth, sit back and do nothing. It is critical at this juncture to allow the dust to settle. You’ve been struggling for so long putting forth a great effort without moving forward it has become critical to allow the solution to come to you. It’s there, you just have to listen. You’ve already practiced getting quiet; now is the time to use that quite to let the solution come to you. You will never find it railing against the ‘bad spirits’ who put you there, so allowing the calm to filter in enables intuitive understanding and insight or solution’s only wellspring to flow forth-that which comes from the inner you. In forcing yourself to calm, you strengthen the spirit while at the same time calling forth understanding, solution, and perspective to come from that same source. If you go long and deep enough, you will find not only clarity but the energy and determination to act, to act in a direction previously not seen amongst the tumult of your initial anguish.

Now how do I come to this understanding? Not from books but hard-earned personal experience. I’ve overcome depression, hopelessness, anger, debilitating anxiety, severe shyness, cancer, near homelessness, several trying failed engagements, losing jobs on several occasions, moving from Boston to Los Angeles without a dime, family member or friend, and spending years trying to get a business going with little success. But I would have it no other way. What I’ve learned and the strength, insight, and ability to aid others in their time of need is priceless.

Everyone can love those who love them, but to love those who despise and use that takes character. Just like everyone knows how to thrive in good times, but during difficult times she who has substance floats to the top passing those merely surviving on image. You need the tough times to prove the spirit to let it strengthen you as it triumphs over the weaker body / mind.

Here’s to your greater depth and strength of character as you build the most successful you. Here’s to your success.

To Achieve One Must Suffer the Insufferable and Endure the Unendurable

Thomas Jefferson lost his father when he was fourteen, his mother at thirty-three, his oldest sister at twenty-two, his wife after their sixth child, and was survived only by one child. Jefferson even states at one point that he had lost everything that was ever near and dear to him, yet he is known today for instilling visionary hope into a young nation through his writing and statesmanship. He never gave up and carried on developing his intellect, maintaining his curiosity, aiding his country, and loving his family as an attentive, doting grandfather. How is this possible?

Before we attempt to answer that question, let’s temper the example above with that of a less severe example.

I have a client who is encountering all kinds of difficulties in trying to remain positive as she goes through trials with her ex who can’t pay alimony or child support; she is in dire need of money to pay her bills, sustain her child, and pay for college. She has given up on men helping her and has resigned to being single the rest of her life. In addition, she keeps seeing people at work who are less talented, intelligent, and worthy getting promoted while she stays put. She has resigned herself to being dirt poor the rest of her life and says it’s all unfair. My client is not ready to take on Jeffersonian trials, but with effort she can grow in her strength to handle difficulties, her own and possibly even those of Jeffersonian proportions.

Here’s a few more quick, famous examples of those who’ve encountered difficulties to flesh out the picture a bit more: George Lucas floated in obscurity for over six years thinking his break would never come; Al Pacino spent close to a decade homeless and living in squalor before his big break: cast as Michael Corleone in The Godfather; billionaire Bill Bartman went bankrupt, lost everything and had to send his wife back to his mother before making his riches; Robert Kiyosaki and his wife had to live in their car before hitting it big; Tony Robbins lived in a small, one-room apartment with so little space he frequently cooked in the bathtub; got rich, lost it all, and got rich again; Dr. Joe Vital of The Secret fame lived in poverty in Dallas for fifteen years. And on and on the examples go.

In attempting to live, never mind achieve or achieve big (and the more you attempt to achieve the greater opportunity for failure, difficulties, and trials), we all will encounter trials that will test and try us and tug at our heartstrings until we feel that we can take no more. This is knowledge that is as common as the cold, yet few speak to it or address it with the attention it deserves. But some of our greatest thinkers have been aware of life’s great challenges, even on occasion coming forth with suggestions:

“Perfect happiness, I believe, was never intended by the Deity to be the lot of any one of his creatures in this world. The most fortunate of us frequently encounter calamities that may greatly afflict us. And to fortify our minds against the attacks of these misfortunes should be one of the principle studies and endeavors of our lives.” Thomas Jefferson

Can we ever “fortify our minds against the attacks of these misfortunes” to the point where adversity will not touch us? No, but like most things with effort there can be improvement. And to fortify ourselves against trials, discomfort, and difficulty should be one of the central efforts in our lives not only to preserve ourselves but to be a beacon in times of darkness for others whom we can encourage by our strength.

“The weakest soul, knowing its own weakness, and believing this truth that strength can only be developed by effort and practice, will, thus believing, at once begin to exert itself, and adding effort to effort, patience to patience, and strength to strength, will never cease to develop, and will at last grow divinely strong.” James Allen

“You are searching for the magic key that will unlock the door to the source of power; and yet you have the key in your own hands, and you may use it the moment you learn to control your thoughts.” Napoleon Hill

“Tempest-tossed souls, wherever ye may be, under whatsoever conditions ye may live, know this: In the ocean of life the isles of Blessedness are smiling, and the sunny shore of your ideal awaits your coming. Keep your hand firmly upon the helm of thought. In the bark of your soul reclines the commanding Master; He does but sleep; wake Him. Self-control is strength; Right Thought is mastery; Calmness is power. Say unto your heart, “Peace, be still!”

Don’t Do More Than You Need to Succeed: Your Anxiety Will Tell You When Enough is Enough

We’ve all heard the terms of praise for the hard worker, the achiever: go getter; dynamo; spark plug; workhorse; mover and shaker; eager beaver.

But as you work hard and often, how much is too much? And in doing too much, do you really gain greater opportunity or lose ground?

Sometimes, in our enthusiasm to achieve-maybe even enthusiasm to please-we overdo it and ruin  rather than encourage opportunity. Case in point:

Author of Thick Face Black Heat, the Warrior Philosophy for Conquering the Challenges of Business and Life, Chin-ning Chu  speaks of her desire to get a book to print at one point in the text. In meeting the deadline of Feb 15, 1991 she pushed her publisher and herself to the limit. The result? Because all of the media attention was on Desert Storm her book disappeared in the war’s media maelstrom. Chu believes that if she had not rushed, if she had stayed on a steady pace, her book would have been brought to light under much more favorable conditions. Because she did not listen well to her anxious heart, she misinterpreted a need for calm as one for greater action.

In learning, I have often found a point of saturation. I read a lot to obtain insight and knowledge as to greater understanding of the human condition outside of that which I gain from my limited perspective and experience. Infrequently as I seek and discover, I obtain a point where enough is enough. At this point I discover that I have the insight I need for my message, my anxiety to discontinue inquiry a demarcation point of discontinuance.

Sometimes as we seek to achieve we ignore the message our anxiety is attempting to convey. Instead of doing less and accepting conditions we do more and feed the anxiety even moving ourselves to failure. But even in times of failure, we are often better off accepting it than wasting time and effort by pushing to do more to right an alleged wrong.

On several occasions in my attempt to achieve greater prosperity, I’ve chosen a particular path. For example, I’ve taken a job that I thought would tide me over until I was able to move laterally into a position that would allow greater upward mobility. Yet while in this situation, I have been fired from several jobs, often due to no fault of my own. Each time as I’ve remained calm and accepting, I’ve moved into greater opportunities than those I anticipated following my preconceived or more forced, unnatural plan.

Sometimes we do too much out of lack of control, but even through the greatest preparation in regards to success in business and life we can never know it all; there is a point where we must simply trust in the fates.

“Chance is always powerful. Let your hook be always cast. In the pool where you least expect it, will be a fish.”– Ovid

And one must certainly push oneself to find the limits in ourselves, our plans, and life. For it is only in the doing, in having faith that all will ultimately work out that we stretch our intuitive muscle to learn of that which cannot be found in books but only in experience.

“Of course we all have our limits, but how can you possibly find your boundaries unless you explore as far and as wide as you possibly can? I would rather fail in an attempt at something new and uncharted than safely succeed in a repeat of something I have done.”– A.E. Hotchner

Ultimately, success is part tangible, part intangible. The tangible is what which we consciously do in an effort to achieve. The intangible is what we listen for and feel along the way as we adjust for greater if not greatest success.

“Success is not to be pursued; it is to be attracted by the person we become.”– Jim Rohn

“In order to succeed, your desire for success should be greater than your fear of failure.”– Bill Cosby

Here’s to your success.

The Power of Negative Thinking: Your Successful Attitude is Arbitrary and Fleeting

Today’s popular appeal in the self-improvement industry is to the power of positive thinking. As a matter of fact, Dr. Peale’s book The Power of Positive Thinking, the main encourager of this phenomenon, will help you learn:

• How to eliminate that most devastating handicap — self doubt
• How to free yourself from worry, stress and resentment
• How to climb above problems to visualize solutions and then attain them
• Simple prayerful exercises that you can do every day, throughout the day, to reinforce your new-found habit of happiness

Now, it’s certainly fine to think positively to focus on positive thoughts. And you do want to overcome the devastation of feeding into anger, fear, and worry. And it certainly is fine to hold onto a “mental picture of yourself as a success” to “practice happy thinking” even every morning to “let pictures of each happy experience you expect to have that day, pass across your mind [to] savor their joy [so that] such thoughts will cause events to turn out that way.”

But unfortunately, there’s a downside to all this happiness.

In recent years, the power of positive thinking has gotten so out of control that if you think negatively or experience negative thoughts you are at fault, need to repent, and avoid ever doing so again. But I’ll let you in on a secret negative thinkers, those advocating positive thoughts are not always positive. They too experience doubt, disappointment, anguish, and pain.

So what’s a poor negative thinker to do?

Well, first of all, let’s take a look at reality.

There is a difference between being positive and negative when dealing with reality. Sure, on the one hand in the long run, you want to be an upbeat and can-do person. But on the other hand, you don’t want to be a perpetual downbeat, can’t-do person. However, if you are generally a positive person and you begin to inordinately experience doubt, fear, worry, anguish and so forth, it’s for a reason. And you need to stop, examine your circumstances and figure out why all this negative stuff is happening and not just block it out with positive thoughts.

What if you are in a job or career that is in dire need of change?

What if you are in a relationship that is falling apart and you need to address the negative issues?

What if you are confronting an individual on a daily basis who is brining you down?

And, more importantly, what if there are deep-seated issues that have been in your psyche since childhood that need to be looked at in detail, confronted, examined, and addressed? It would certainly be foolish to try to just think positive thoughts to overcome here.

Sometimes, being too positive or overly optimistic can be problematic. What if you are a CEO, physician, or general in the field of battle who must deal with the reality of the negative or not so favorable facts? Should the CEO ignore the negative financial reports coming in with positive thoughts? The doctor with a patient who has a life-threatening illness with positive thoughts? The general in the field who is outnumbered with positive thoughts?

OK, not many may be CEO’s, doctors, or generals in the battlefield, but you see my point. However, it is also critical to not avoid those everyday negatives that arise: jealousy, anger, spite, fear, remorse, doubt, hatred, shame, worry, delusion, and so on. Even the generally positive person will have such emotions arise on occasion. And that’s OK. They are there for a reason, warning signals that must be addressed not ignored or glossed over with positive mantras.

At times, self-examination alone is not enough to fix some of the negatives. Depending on the complexity and depth of the issue, you may have to go to a professional. But for lesser issues, and for those who have had some training in doing so, self-examination is enough. For instance, if you are a normally emotionally healthy person and you find yourself all of a sudden becoming jealous of someone’s success, maybe it’s merely a signal that it’s time for a change in your life. Maybe you need to obtain some of that success for yourself.

Now some in the field of motivation and success advocate positive thinking like it’s the only avenue to success. And, sure, you would probably prefer to be a bright, shiny, positive thinker than a dull, downcast, negative one. But you certainly shouldn’t put your work toward success on hold until you become the paragon of positive thinking.

And who knows? maybe you’ll never get rid of the negative? Lincoln didn’t. Here’s a man who often suffered extreme bouts with depression and a fascination with death. But he still achieved within his “negativity.”

And who’s to say negativity is not of an arbitrary nature? For in the United States, someone who is a pushy, get ‘er done, go getter is generally looked at in a positive light. But if you put that same person in certain countries in Asia such actions would be looked at as highly undesirable, maybe even negative.

And who knows? Maybe the reason your negative is that you’re just uninspired and it’s time for change and continued growth. Hell, if you had reached this point and thought “Gee, I’m negative, I’ve got to think happy thoughts” then this would not be considered positive thinking but insanity. It’s not negativity but uninspiring goals that are your problem.

The bottom line here is that being negative is not a death sentence nor is being positive an indicator that all is well. It’s best to be somewhere in between, a realist, and to take an honest look at what is causing you distress or, for that matter, what is causing you happiness and joy. An active, examining, honest mind is your best tool to success and not worrying too much one way or the other how much more positive or negative you “need to be” according to somone’s arbitrary standard.

Here’s to your success.

Decision Making Skills and Their Development: Critical Tool for Career Success

I had thought about this topic hard and long and was ready to write, but after writing the title of this article, I got to asking myself, What exactly is ‘decision making skills’? Well, according to a rather dry, scientific definition one could say it’s the choosing between alternative courses of action. It is a process that involves establishing objectives, gathering relevant information, identifying alternatives, setting criteria for the decision, and selecting the best option. But those last few words have quickly become troublesome to me: “selecting the best option.”

Hmmm, OK, here’s the rub. The method mentioned above is very similar to that which I used one time (key word here, “one”) in making a “career decision;” well, kind of. I was working on my undergrad degree while supporting myself with a decent paying job, but I decided that I wanted to work from home so I could apply the forty-hours-a-month saved on drive time to my studies. So here’s what happened.

I found a job where I could work from home managing a high-end startup’s data base, for I used to work in the computer field and had the experience. So I sat down and made out a pros / cons list. There were roughly thirty-six pros and six cons. I knew my objectives, had gathered relevant information, identified alternatives, made out my list and came up with an answer which according to the above method seemed clear cut and obvious. So I quit my job and took the new job according to this, shall we say, scientific decision making process.

But there was one problem.

Even though all the data and analysis pointed to the answer stated above, something in my gut told me “Don’t take the job.” Was my gut right? Should I scrap all the “scientific” method? We’ll see shortly how this intuitive or gut instinct plays out in decision making on a small and large scale.

After quitting my job, attempting for weeks to get set up at home with office equipment from the new company, I realized that it wasn’t going to work. My boss, or the owner of this startup, turned out to be a flake. I ultimately ended up going to small claims court with three other potential new employees only to have the startup owner counter sue us by taking us to superior court.

My attorney advised me to just drop the case, for even if I won (which could end up costing thousands more) the chance of my ever collecting the money was slim. So I ended up being out some $5000 in lost salary, lost time, and a lost job. I eventually got my old job back, but my using this more academic-type or technical decision-making process turned out to be tremendously costly.

Moral of the story? Now I listen to my gut all the time, and it has served me tremendously without fail.

So you thought you were going to come here and learn some specific, academically rigerious methodical skills that would aid you in your decision making? Well, I can give you some help there, for it does take a certain level of discipline, critical thinking, and thorough analysis to get to the point where you use your gut, but at the core, at the foundation is the critical need to develop one’s intuitive understanding to make key decisions.

But the bottom line is that after you’ve learned how to look at what’s out there, who to trust and what to trust in your research (part of the critical thinking that is more cold, hard, academic or scientific), ultimately you are going to be the most successful in skills competencies or competency skills (being effective) when using intuition or gut instinct.

Not sure? Here’s a few examples for you.

Donald Trump speaks of going with his “gut instinct.” At one point, after he had lost millions, he was feeling quite low and had no desire to go out. He received a call that there was a party in New York City close to where he lived at the time and the caller had invited Trump. The caller also mentioned that in all likelihood there was going to be several bankers in attendance. When your business is not doing well, you end up owing a lot of money, and it’s usually banks who are calling to collect on outstanding loans, which Trump had several of.

He initially thought that going to the party would be the worst thing he could do. Even when things were going well, he did not attend parties frequently nor see a need to. And considering that he felt down, not in a party mood, it was raining and he had no driver so he’d have to walk, and that there would be bankers in attendance who he probably owed money to, why go? But amazingly enough, a strong gut feeling told him he should. Trump frequently relies on his gut and it hadn’t let him down yet, so he went.

Upon arriving at the party, he actually began to feel better. He sat down and talked to people, and before he knew it he was lost in conversation. At one point, he realized that the person sitting next to him was someone he knew, infamously. It was not only a banker but one whom he hated vehemently and had said many bad things about publicly. But what came next was the most unexpected thing. They began to hit it off amongst the barbs being shot back and forth, and ultimately it was this banker who helped him most in getting him back up on his feet financially.

This is certainly not something that could have been planned for or an event that could have come about using any type of formal or academic decision theory. And I can tell you that I have used this “gut instinct” or intuition for decisions large and small, and it has rarely failed me and has certainly produced greater results than using hard decision theory. Consider that some of the greatest minds have used scientific decision theory to great failure and you’ll see great truth to my statement.

But here we are not talking about leading a company or a country. We are talking about assessing skills or decision making skills to aid you in personal choice, specifically here career choice. But after you’ve made that career decision using your gut instinct or intuitive understanding, you might want to continue to use it on the job. Case in point:

There is a gentleman by the name of Mohamed A. El-Erian, co-CEO and co-CIO of PIMCO, one of the largest investment management companies in the world. He formerly served as president and CEO of Harvard Management Company, a firm that manages the university’s $35 billion endowment. Nice resume, huh. But I mention him for a reason.

He puts great stock in the intuitive or gut instinct.

In his book, When Markets Collide, El-Erain makes a revealing statement: “I will uncover many of the understandable reasons why otherwise rational and well-informed investor can be late in recognizing important turning points and be prone to mistakes” (2). His point being that here’s some highly intelligent individuals who have had their scientific decision making models fail them. There are always things that happen that can’t be foreseen.

Even Stephen Hawking, our modern-day Einstein, says that no theory is absolute, or no theory can be proven absolutely true because we just don’t know enough. We have limits in the extreme when it comes to knowing all or looking into the future, I hope you know. But back to my point.

With the global market changing so much, more countries coming on board as they move out of communism, this has created the new or unexpected or what El-Erain labels “noise.” The point he makes is that this noise or newness should not be simply dismissed or ignored. Another skill for those looking to enhance skills competency or competency skills is to keep an open mind to new idea and to be tolerant of the same. Those of the greatest minds remain nimble in their thinking allowing for creative new possibilities. This being how Einstein through his theory of relativity was able to take established thinking that had been accepted for decades and dispense with it, even though it was that of his hero and mentor Sir Isaac Newton.

What often happens while attempting to make decisions is that one will or can never know enough to make a decision based solely on existing knowledge or data. And this often results in paralysis of analysis where the individual gets so bogged down in needing to know for sure that he does nothing at all. But our friend El-Erain has something to say about this.

There are those who develop instinct, gut feeling, or intuitive understanding , and it is these people, the Bill Gates, Donald Trumps, and Edward Cowen’s of the world who know of its great worth. Edward Cowen you say?

El-Erain discovered early in his career not to ignore “noise” and that he should “ask whether there are signals within the noise,” meaning, open your mind and don’t block out the new or unknown to discover the answer. As a young analyst, he met a man named Edward Cowen who taught him the lesson above. El-Erain mentioned that Edward’s “instincts were so sharp that they more than complemented . . . his rigorous training in economics and a command of finance mathematics.” Yes, his instincts were equally important to that of his knowledge, a critical point.

El-Erain continues: “Indeed, he illustrated back then what work, particularly in behavioral finance and neuroscience, has confirmed: The importance of instincts, especially during periods of market stress.”

Those who excel and exceed the majority, or who exceed most in their competence skills, certainly do their homework, but when it comes down to the nitty gritty must go where science, theory, and math cannot: the intuitive gut instinct.

This by far is one of your most important decision making skills in not only finding the right career but making the best and most accurate decisions within that career, especially in times of stress when everyone else is looking to the known while you look with acceptance and understanding to the unknown and unfamiliar to discover your answer. And in developing this skill you will be one of the few, the sought after.

Here’s to your success.

Learning to Think Like Da Vinci Will Aid You in Your Career and Life

In the History Channel’s Da Vinci and the Code, the code has nothing to do with Dan Brown’s work but refers instead to Da Vinci’s work ethic, curiosity, and, most importantly, the discipline needed to keep working and moving forward, even through tumultuous times–in 15 th century Italy life was little valued, especially if you were of the working class.

Today, most know of Da Vinci as a painter, but he was much more than that.

Da Vinci was a mathematician, engineer, inventor, anatomist, painter, sculptor, architect, botanist, musician, and writer. Many of his ideas were considerably ahead of their time. He envisioned a helicopter, a tank, solar power, a calculator, and outlined a rudimentary theory of plate tectonics. His ideas were so advanced that most could only be left to linger in theory. However, some of his inventions were used in the 15th century, such as a machine for testing tensile strength wire. As a scientist, he advanced knowledge in the fields of anatomy, civil engineering, optics, and hydrodynamics.

But is da Vinci an exception who can’t be touched? What really made him so unique? Where does the secret lie?

In this day n age of the specialist, we are not advised to be a Renaissance man or woman. We are told not to be a Jack- or Jane-of-all-trades. But if we listen to the popular notion there’s a good chance we are doing something really wrong. According to Napoleon Hill, we need to be careful who tells us what:

“Who said it could not be done? And what great victories has he to his credit which qualify him to judge others accurately?”

Hill also said of failure:

“Every failure is a blessing in disguise, providing it teaches some needed lesson one could not have learned without it. Most so-called failures are only temporary defeats.”

Da Vinci would agree, for he did not see failure as something to stop him or even slow him down.

Da Vinci’s extreme contributions to many fields only rival that of the great Michelangelo. Ironically, it was it was a fierce competition with Michelangelo at the end of da Vinci’s life that nearly put him out of commission. But it was his belief in himself, in his vision, that kept him going.

“Obstacles cannot crush me. Every obstacle yields to stern resolve. He who is fixed to a star does not change his mind.” da Vinci

Was da Vinci the great man he was, the great discoverer, the great Renaissance man, merely because he was born that way? Or did he have to earn it?

“I love those who can smile in trouble, who can gather strength from distress, and grow brave by reflection. ‘Tis the business of little minds to shrink, but they whose heart is firm, and whose conscience approves their conduct, will pursue their principles unto death.” da Vinci

Did da Vinci make discoveries or was he made by them? How much of his effort, his desire, pealed back information and knowledge that was there merely waiting to be discovered? How many of his discoveries were made simply through unrelenting desire to learn, to see the truth, to uncover that which was already there?

But a more important question is, can you do the same? To what degree?

But before we can attempt to answer that question, let’s get the word “discovery” clearly defined in our mind’s eye.

Discovery: the act of revealing; disclosure.

It doesn’t say the act of making something from nothing but to “reveal,” to “disclose” that which already exists. As in radio waves being merely revealed not invented or put there. As in the laws of gravity being revealed not imagined and then placed by man for discovery.

What can you discover? How do you do it? Let’s ask da Vinci.

“All our knowledge has its origins in our perceptions.” da Vinci

But what is “perception”?

Perception: mental grasp of objects, qualities, etc. by means of the senses; awareness; comprehension. The understanding, knowledge, etc. gotten by perceiving.

Da Vinci was the great envisioner he was because he perceived and conceived. He studied birds and how their wings moved in order to fly, and he envisioned man doing the same. He looked at fish swimming in water and envisioned man doing the same or at least functioning under water. He envisioned the human body and enquired and explored.

So the big question of the day is, what da Vinci-ing have you done lately?

But is all that work worth it? What’s your motivation? Should you simply do so much without adequate cause? Here’s what da Vinci has to say.

“A day well-spent brings happy sleep, so a life well-spent brings happy death.” da Vinci

He was certainly a man of action. Much action . . . action . . . action . . .

“I have been impressed with the urgency of doing. Knowing is not enough; we must apply. Being willing is not enough; we must do.” Da Vinci

It is a universal principle that effort given is reward received. Only those who sweat (genius is 99% perspiration, 1% inspiration) imbibe of the great knowledge merely waiting to be reviled to the deserving few. Great insight is not unique in that it lies in wait for a “special person.” All are privy to its gain. But to gain one must study, learn, observe, and discipline the mind and condition the soul for greatness. For great knowledge lies in wait for those of great desire, character, and faith in the finding.

How does this apply today to your career and life?

Consider that many “experts” say that you’ll have three to five career changes over your working life-time; some say as many as ten career changes. Today not only do jobs, careers, and businesses come and go but entire economic sectors. Are you going to go back to school every career change for four years to update your skills? Do you understand that any educational institution is the tip of the ice burg that education is not institutional but individual?

Now, more than ever before, in this age of turbulence (Read Allen Greenspan’s Age of Turbulence) economic change is occurring more and more rapidly, the innate creative destruction of capitalism is moving faster and faster.

In this regard, you need to be an entrepreneur, a company of one, regardless of whether or not you desire to own a business, for job stability or security (if there ever was such a thing) is a thing of the past. America no longer stands alone without competition. This is not post WWII 60s / 70s where America was the only first-world country still standing. You must become a polymath and learn again and again new skills, attitudes, and knowledge to gain a toe-hold on not only career stability but success. So get to DaVinci-ing.

Here’s to your success.

Want to Excel in Career and Life? Memory: Learn How to Work It

“Memory is the mother of all wisdom” Aeschylus, founder of Greek tragedy.

You’ve probably heard the hype made by companies promising an amazing’ memory: learn how to increase your memory ten fold; never forget another name again; weeks, months, years later recall at will all that you’ve seen; on and on the promises go. But unless you have a brain transplant, you’re really only as good as the software you’ve been given. Meaning, there are no miracles. There are techniques that can improve memory, but the key, the secret is in the individual’s increased concentration because of great desire and passion for what one is learning combined with just plain old hard work. If you have a great need and interest or motivation to remember, your chance of doing so increases considerably over those with a lukewarm interest. Few memory courses will aid you in retaining, processing, and recalling knowledge that you consider irrelevant and pointless. As I said above, passion and plain old hard work, so let’s get into it.

“The true art of memory is the art of attention” Samuel Johnson.

Any great project requires a good memory. The better the memory the smoother the flow of intake, process, retain, and recall. Want to get a job done right? Pass a test with flying colors? Memory, learn how to work it. And don’t worry too much about forgetting. If you do, that lack of faith may just encourage such a thing. But for the faithful, they believe that there just may be no such thing as forgetting.

“The existence of forgetting has never been proved: We only know that some things don’t come to mind when we want them” Friedrich Nietzsche.

There are a lot of things that can certainly inhibit memory: fatigue, hunger, poor diet, anger, depression, and so on. But there’s proof that those who use their minds often and for a long time, as in well into one’s life, there’s even been evidence that memory can continue to stay strong and healthy. But before we go any further, let’s take a look at the two sides of memory.

First, you need to understand that there is short-term and long-term memory. The key is getting the stuff in short-term into long-term. Now, once you get it there in order to keep it there, once again, requires work. Remember the old saying, use it or loose it? Well, you certainly need to work to get it in there, but in order to keep it there-long term-you need to work at that too with regular practice.

So what’s the work involved? What can you do to enhance your memory? Let’s get into it.

1. Take it easy and slow down. You need to be calm and focused, better yet, in the zone. Turn off the TV, cut the conversations, lock the door, put out the cat, tell the girlfriend you’ll see her later. Get to focusing and get to work. And remember, as my little Mikie says to me whenever he’s losing, “Daddy, it’s not a race.” When I’m working, or concentrating on what I love to do, my focus is so great that I can work downstairs blocking out the television and multiple conversations. Not the best environment for working the memory, like I said above, but with passion and desire, your focus or ability to use memory is enhanced considerably.And over the years I have almost exclusively worked without distraction in building up my ‘focus’ ability. To cite another example, I remember years ago blasting my new Led Zeppelin DVD while reading The Universe is a Green Dragon: A Cosmic Creation Story by Brian Swimme, PhD. Through it all, I was not only able to pick up on what I was reading, but remembered the main points well enough after that one reading to teach it the next day in class. I was filling for a week for an ailing colleague. And don’t go thinking I have a photographic memory. No, that’s my colleague who I stood in for. I’ve acquired my ability to remember better than most simply through work.

2. But you say you’re still distracted? Sure, sounds great, Jeff. Just get to work. Easier said than done. I’ve got bills to pay, an interview coming up, the Lakers will be taking on the Celtics in just under three hours (reason for my three hour time limit on this work session), and so the distractions go. Maybe, just maybe, you can’t do it now. You’ve got to get rid of that distraction or two or three before you could even think about concentrating enough to get to the task at hand. OK, go take care of it. But if you have to deal with your scheduled work session, what are you going do? I suggest writing out everything that is blocking you until you’ve exhausted the distraction(s). Focus on what’s distracting you and then once that is out of the way or as much as you can get it out of the way get to work. It’s a technique I have my students and clients use. Write, write, write, until the distractions are all out on paper (good place to put stuff that’s bugging you; you can get back to it later since you’ve recorded it) and then get to the task at hand. Now all this is not to help you to remember things better but to get things out of the way that will inhibit you from doing so.

3. Wa-wa-wa-wandering on and on, here to there, to and fro, and beyond. In one survey, college students were asked what they were thinking eight random times a day. Some said they weren’t thinking about what they were doing 30% of the time. Some were “elsewhere” 80 to 90% of the time. I gave a final one semester and about ten minutes before it began a dozen or so students were mulling about. I asked them if they remembered to bring their blue composition books. Only one out of a dozen students had brought it, but he made an interesting point when he said, “Gee professor, you told us ten times to bring one.” So this is certainly an acquired skill. Work at focusing on focusing. One of the best ways to do this is to, once again, write. Because when you’re writing, as fingers press keyboard or pen / pencil marks the page, it’s difficult to do anything else. Well, you can do other things, but the results of your writing will be poor. In order to do the job well, you’ll have to focus, focus, focus, focus. So get to it.

4. But what should I focus on? Good question. As Einstein said, why commit something to memory if you can look it up? That’s right, don’t put junk in there you don’t need. In college, if you read everything, you’d never pass. Huh? Yes, I remember, especially senior year and in graduate school, I tried to do ALL the reading. Not smart. One class alone was over one-hundred pages a week. What about the other four or five classes? Forget it. There was no way I was going to read it all, never mind remember everything I read. So we have to go to our critical thinking skills here to figure out how to pare it down.

This will take another paragraph; hang in there. I use the gear box analogy to explain this technique. First and foremost, you have to know what you’re looking for, what’s important, what’s required. Work from the question(s) to the answer(s). Why am I reading? What’s the answer I’m looking for? Where is it? In most cases, the main point is what you’re looking for. Where is it? In the introduction and / or conclusion. Or in a smaller sense in the topic sentence of each paragraph. Often there’s a lot of filler if you know what you’re looking for, so here you’re in fourth or fifth gear, skimming (over the years I’ve learned to be ruthless in skimming the unessential–it’s the only way to survive and thrive; sorry authors). Shifting speeds while reading is a key to memory-cut out the unnecessary. Get to the point. Gloss over introductory material, stories, examples, and get to the main point. Look for key words: “critical” “vital” “imperative.” Or some authors will tell you outright, “Here’s the main point.” Personally, my favorite. When I’m teaching I tell my students three times when I have something important to say, “This is important. This is important. This is important. Hey, did I tell you this is important?” You get the idea.

OK, now you have got to keep it-the stuff you’ve begun to memorize. How’s that done? Here, check it out.

1. Study it over and over and over again. Thought I had an easy answer for ya? Nope. One way of keeping it in your head is by writing books and articles. What? That’s right. Why do you think I write so much? (seven books, over 300 articles, dozens of poems) I want to know what I’m talking about in regards to what I’m teaching, coaching, and speaking, so I write, and write, and write, and write. Best way to learn it and retain it. Other ways. Well, first you have to read. But if you’re studying a particular topic or issue, don’t just read one book or article. Read several, many from different perspectives and styles. Maybe at first you don’t get it, but after a second or third author it makes sense because it’s said in just the right way or something that had been glossed over is presented in greater detail and then Bingo! You get it. Also, annotate. Get involved with the text. I never read without a pen and or pencil. I am always writing in the margins, summarizing, critiquing, questioning, agreeing, disagreeing. By being fully engaged using as many techniques and as many senses as possible and coming from as many angles as you can, the better the chance that you’ll not only get what you’re reading but you’ll retain it.

2. Learn it too much. Just because you get it doesn’t mean you know it. The best way to know if you’ve really got something is by trying to explain what you’ve learned to someone. And if you know it that well, you’ve really worked your memory by reading, taking notes, annotating, reading various authors on the same subject-the learn-too-much technique. It’s easy while sitting quietly reading and or writing to believe you know it. But the real test is can you explain it to someone else so that they understand and get it? Teaching is the best way to test whether or not you’ve got it. In one semester-long seminar in which a group of teachers got together every other Saturday to learn how to teach, we were told time and again, the closer we can get our students to actually teaching the greater the chance that they would take the knowledge deep and truly understand it and retain it. Worst thing you can do is just listen to someone and expect to get it and retain it. Next is simply by reading. But best of all is explaining verbally without a net (book, notes, video) what you know. Doing this work is like lifting heavy weights. It will strengthen your memory. If you just life five pound weights all your life you’ll never build muscle. Same thing goes for brain matter. Work it, sister.

3. Test yourself. So you think you really know it? Probably not. Ask yourself questions, definitions, key terms, points, and so on. Do you really know it? This is how I developed my vocabulary. I used to write down words that I saw over and over but didn’t know the meanings to. So I’d fill up a page with words and their definitions. And over a period of days or weeks, however long it took, I’d quiz myself hiding the definitions until I got them all. When I was done I’d tear up the page and start over. Same with basketball free throws. I’d shoot one-hundred free throws until I hit eighty percent. If I got to a point where I wasn’t going to be able to get 80 percent, I’d start over. Did I become a good shooter? You bet. Did the same thing with shoot arounds. Different shots from here and there and here and there. I’d shoot for a particular percentage and keep going until I hit it, passed out, or my mom called me in for dinner. What did I say at the beginning of the article? What did I say? What did I say? Oh, yeah: Work. There you have it.

4. Associate, connect, and personalize. Today, I rarely if ever read or study something that isn’t related to personal interest: spirituality, history, success, business, and so on. I’m always trying to connect personal interest to what I’m learning, studying, trying to remember and retain. If you want it, desire it with passion, much greater chance it will stick and stay. If you can connect and associate to what you’re trying to learn, of course there’s a much greater chance you’ll retain it and keep it in a safe place for keeping. There are those times you may not be on fire about what you’re working with, but if there is motivation, self-motivation there is greater memorization.

5. Connect it to something that will help it stick. You can use acronyms FACE (notes between the lines) and Every Good Boy Does Fine (notes on the lines) to retain the notes of the Treble Clef. Columbus sailed the ocean blue in 1492. It doesn’t work all the time, but it’s helpful using mnemonic or memory aiding devices when the occasion warrants it. But most of the time it’s just going back over and again until you have got it good and solid, and then reviewing occasionally so it doesn’t slip away.

6. You can picture it, draw it, speak it, sing it, map it, imagine it in nature, or express it physically. In a previous article, I spoke of the eight intelligences: logic / math, linguistic, inter-personal, intra-personal, naturalistic, kinesthetic, musical, spatial. I used to remember my stand up act (yes, professional comic for five years) by first writing and then speaking it into a tape player to get the natural rhythm of language as well as to retain the routine in my memory. Some have to speak it to themselves or others to, first, see it, think it out, and then to retain. Others have to draw, map, express it physically, whatever it takes to keep it in your head. I had one student who told me he couldn’t write in his journal. I asked, why? He said because he needs to draw as well. My five-year-old remembers colors, shapes, and numbers by singing. By all means, whatever it takes, do it.

Well, that’s not all there is to memory, memorizing, and retaining. But it’s a good start. Personally, I have used a majority of the methods of memory improvement mentioned here. And because of the practice, I have improved my memory considerably. My ability to focus (key word here) on key questions and to obtain the answers has been remarkable. I don’t say this to brag, but to impress upon you the worth of the above techniques.

For example, in recent months I gave a talk that took me just a few hours to prepare from scratch. I was told I would have thirty minutes to speak as keynote speaker. What I did initially was read several articles on material related to the main point of the talk, more than I needed to (over prepare or “learn it too much”). I took one of the articles and generally used several main points from it to build my outline around and circled those points. I also jotted down some notes and a larger overall outline to complete the talk.

That’s it. I didn’t memorize anything nor did I practice the talk even once. Now, keep in mind this comes after much practice and work, work, work, work. But if you do the work, you can and should be able to reach this point in the process. When I first began speaking, I was terrible, but after much, much, much practice I have achieved relative ease in not only putting together a talk but in presenting it. And no, I was not that familiar with the material, even. Meaning, I am by no stretch of the imagination an expert in what I was going to talk about.

Now, another technique I used during the talk was that of a reliance on the intuitive or sixth sense, meaning, I allowed the talk to come to me. This is the reason I didn’t memorize anything nor did I desire to practice, for I wanted the talk to flow to be organic and natural. I was allowing my trained and trusting memory to do the work. Hell, I’d worked hard enough training it, it should cooperate.

As I spoke, a miraculous thing occurred. Yes, the talk came to me. At several points impromptu, spur of the moment points came as I spoke. And amazingly enough as I finished these points, I looked down at the outline (the article I had circled key points from) and noticed the next point fell right in line with what I had been saying.

Now, I’m not telling you this to encourage you to do the same-for this is for advanced speakers only-but to drive home my point that one can improve his memory with techniques and a little bit of faith. I hope this has been of help to you in all your memory requiring endeavors.

Here’s to your success.

Choosing a New Career: Why a Career Coach is Your Best Option

If you’ve been out of high school for some time, I’d like you to think back to that time. For those who’ve graduated more recently, not as challenging a task, of course. Nevertheless, in all likelihood, you are probably like most in that you didn’t receive much help in matching a career with personal interests. Most may not even remember going to a career guidance counselor or getting much career counseling at all. And this is one of the major downfalls to our educational system.

Now this is not an education reform article, but rather a focus on career and, more specifically, career change. But in choosing a career or choosing a new career, in most cases the person has not had the extensive prelim work done to ensure the best career to client match. Rarely has the person seeking a career or career change been asked the proper questions letting existing personal knowledge and understanding do the talking. Usually a counselor, adviser, or consultant will use his or her knowledge and experience to basically tell the person where he needs to be.

It’s kind of like those career placement tests that tell you, you should be a social worker while inside you’ve been dreaming for years of being a movie director. And what often happens is that in our youth we are swayed by those we perceive to be “more experienced,” only to find out five or ten years down the road after developing a greater sense of self that we should have gone with our original desire in the first place and spend years getting back to where we should have been from the start.

But there are other distractions. Unfortunately, the majority of people get waylaid by exclusive focus on money, prestige, satisfying parental desires, and so forth. It takes a brave and dedicated individual to follow her true desires, to take an honest, hard, cold look in the mirror to discover best how to use her abilities, talents, and gifts. There has even been many a successful person who in the midst of great success feels empty and desires change all because of being more true to the ideals of others or the general ideals perpetuated by society.

The cause? Not enough work on discovering the many tangibles and intangibles of self that will aid the individual in not only being successful monetarily but to discover fulfillment and joy emotionally and spiritually even.

So how is this done?

Well, few know because even though it is that which should be done early and often it’s usually not until years later-five to ten years, or in some cases even more-before the money, prestige and keeping parents happy can no longer hold one back from a dire need to fulfill dreams.

In actuality, it’s a rather straight forward process, and I am often surprised to discover the number of intelligent, well-educated individuals who’ve never discovered their sole purpose. And if you don’t think you have one, think again.

Of course for many there are those immature desires. I can remember desiring to be a basketball or sports star and then a famous actor, but they didn’t happen. And it’s not that I couldn’t have excelled at either, for I was always one of the best on the court and my ability to entertain was a strength too (as a matter of fact, I performed for over five years doing standup in Boston and Los Angeles). However, I knew that my real calling in life lie elsewhere. And when I found it, it was like coming home. It will be the same for you. You may not recognize it right away or feel like home right away, but with the proper prompting and work and encouragement it eventually will.

So what needs to be done to discover that career that life’s calling that’s been there from the beginning? Because the process is rather involved, I will only give a brief summary here.

First, you must look at all important areas of your life. Some examples are health, family, physical environment, money, career, friends and family, romance / significant other, fun and recreation. If you don’t look at your life as a whole in deciding career, you will more than likely career change and career transition until the cows come home.

But there’s more.

Now you must research your talents, abilities, gifts to determine where and how you will make your money. You will not know specifically up front, but that’s OK. As the successful say, shoot and then aim. You will have a general understanding of where you’ll be going but only by following the path on a daily, monthly, yearly bases, even, will a specific understanding of ultimate achievement come to fruition or reveal itself. There is no other way.

Next, you must look at character. We all have character flaws that need to be addressed. Remember that success can come because of your talents and gifts, but just look at the news headlines of the many mighty successful who have fallen and fallen hard and you’ll see why character is critical. As a matter of fact, no amount of talent, ability, knowledge, or gifts can compensate for the self-sabotaging of poor character.

Finally, you must study and know inside and out all the critical success principles: how to work well with others, tolerance of others and ideas, creativity, honor and self-accountability, self-control, succeeding through failure, and so on. Without a thorough understanding here, you are limited . . . in the extreme.

Well, I’m excited. I hope you are too. I always get excited or passionate about what I love. You will too. We all need a passion career. Let me help you build yours.

Here’s to your success.

Critical, Creative, Intuitive Thinking: All You’ll Ever Need in Life

Looking to impress that special someone?

Need to build a new cabinet under the kitchen sink?

Need to make a career change?

It’s a bedtime story you need?

Have to make an important political decision?

Got an exam you’ve got to pass?

On and on and on it goes. All begins in thought. Everything under the sun began as an imagined reality that eventually came to fruition. Yes, even the sun, the moon and the earth . . . and then some. But what is most sad of all is that critical / creative / intuitive thinking-the most important tool you’ll ever need-is left on the back burner and little touched during one’s formative education years. Most of the time it’s memorize, regurgitate, and purge. Yes, purge-intentionally or through lack of use. Education often overlooks the most important skills we can learn to focus almost exclusively on content. It’s like an artist knowing color, shape, and form but not having the heart and vision to do anything more than copy what she sees.

How sad.

But there’s hope.

Let’s begin that hope by focusing on critical thinking first. What is it? When I told a friend of mine that I teach critical thinking, he asked, “What’s that?” I told him, “I teach people how to think.” He laughed, “What’s there to thinking?” A lot, actually, much more than most believe-a testament to our educational system’s lack. But that’s not the focus of this article. Let’s get into the thinking, shall we?

Critical Thinking: Three Part Model

Reasoning: Foundation of Critical Thinking

Critical thinking is technically defined as the ability to come to a conclusion based on one or more arguments. Here arguments are not Jerry Springer Show, chair over the head smack downs, but rather a discussion: “The aim of argument, or of discussion, should not be victory, but progress” Joseph Joubert.

Arguments typically persuade (persuasion, argument’s cousin) with good, clear reasoning. They are sound logically and the evidence that supports them is reasonable, and in most cases, good arguments have evidence that is more reasonable than those that support other, lesser arguments. For example, if I told you that all conspiracy theories are true because Dr. Thompson of Quack University said so, you would know my evidence is not sound or reasonable. One, because making an absolute statement (as in “always” “never” “all”) is often incorrect. Very little is always or never true. And you would know that I’m making a generalization based on limited support. We’ve also got a hasty conclusion here (picking one conclusion when others are possible). I would probably need to bring in other experts to concur as well as some research and data to solidify my argument.

Assumptions:

Often these are lying underneath the argument going unnoticed and unmentioned. For example, if someone says “Every parent needs to be responsible for their child’s education,” how many would pick up on the fact that this person is conservative? If someone states that “Nuclear energy is not a viable source of alternative energy,” how many would pick up on the fact that this person has come forward because there are plans in the near future to build a nuclear reactor in his back yard. And so on. In arguments I teach that there are two levels of thought: one, the one you are arguing on, and two, the counter argument or refutation that looks to take down or invalidate your argument.

Logical Fallacies:

These are some of the most common and pernicious aspects of arguments. These are basically tricks or misdirection in thinking, getting people off the topic or issue at hand to distract attention elsewhere. These happen unintentionally but intentionally as well, for there are those who don’t have a sound argument and try to get you not to notice by distraction. Now, a few of the more popular fallacies:

Ad hominem: a personal attack. During Clinton’s campaign, many attempted to attack his character not his track record as a two-term governor of Arkansas-where he had very solid political record.

Red herring: or getting someone off the trail by distracting with an unrelated issue. For example, “I’m going to grade this test on a curve because it creates a better relationship between student and teacher.” Wrong! The issue at hand here is not “student / teacher relations” but rather the student’s education.

Either or thinking: “Either you’re for our troops in Iraq or you’re not.” Often this is to get people to kowtow to one’s desires. It is lazy or abusive thinking. There are often grey areas that which people who use this fallacy don’t want to deal with.

There are many more fallacies, but I think you get the point.

There’s quite a bit more to critical thinking than I can talk about in this one article, but there are a few other points that need to be addressed before we can move on. First, a good critical thinker admits that she doesn’t know. As I state to my students and clients “We are all equal in our infinite ignorance.” What we don’t know is quite a bit more than we’ll ever know. Not sure about this? I tell my students that if they think they know a lot, go into any large library, stand in the middle of the middle floor and regurgitate on cue every word in every volume. OK, begin. How far did you get? There, I told you so.

That’s why with complex issues, like health reform, illegal immigration, and global warming, you may want to take considerable time before you arrive at a solid argument. Personally, regarding illegal immigration it took me several years of researching, listening to immigration stories from those who have been there, writing several articles and observing the responses before I reached a well-thought out conclusion as to the main cause for this issue being an emotional hot-button. And I discovered that it is not based in fact but rather emotional reaction to race.

And there’s another point to consider: emotion. When we deal with arguments emotion is not only frequently attached but hard-coded embedded. Often it breaks down to an emotional sword fight (”Hey, that’s MY’ argument you’re dis-ing here!”) more than a logical one. To argue best, one must work at detaching from one’s emotions. Certainly easier said than done, for I’ve certainly failed on occasion even being quite aware of this foible, but it needs to be mastered to argue from a solid position. No one’s perfect, but we’re not looking for perfection, remember, but a moving forward.

So some things to think about regarding critical thinking: admit you don’t know; you have emotional buttons that can be pushed; there is often great complexity in issues; you need to research and verify complex arguments.

Bottom line, critical thinking is key in making any important decision be it personal, local, national, or otherwise.

Creative Thinking:

OK, let’s get this out of the way right off the bat. If you’re thinking creativity is beyond your grasp or interest that it’s only for artists or those “creative types” think again. Consider the following:

The creative sector of the U.S. economy accounts for $1.7 trillion per year, nearly half of all wages and salaries. So if you think creativity equals art and art is simply the candy store of the economic sector, think again. Not that creativity is all about making money, no. But many do have a false understanding of the important role creativity not only plays in our lives economically, but intellectually and spiritually. It is an all encompassing, multi- faceted tool.

Who are these “creative” people in the economic sector? They are artists, designers, writers, analysts, musicians, entrepreneurs, inventors, scientists, engineers, and so on.

What type of mind set is required to be “creative”? Open minded, flexible, forward-looking, innovative, tolerant, experimental, hopeful, all that one needs to create.

Let’s take a look at the field of science as an example. Specifically, let’s look at physicists or those attempting to come up with a theory that ties quantum with relativity to discover the mind of God or why we are here, where we came from, and where we are going. For it is this theory, or string theory, when found will allegedly, according to some scientists, tie the two aforementioned theories together and we will, according to Stephen Hawking, discover the mind of God.

Now in order to work with this theory one certainly needs all the attributes mentioned above and more. Patience certainly needs to be involved as well, for according to scientist there are so many possible outcomes or answers that the theory is not even right. Huh? Well, that’s where an open, flexible, forward-looking, innovative, tolerant, hopeful mind comes into play. You can see the merit of all these characteristics alone or existing outside creativity. In order to be successful in career and in life one needs these attributes, so it’s no accident that they are so valuable and of such great merit to our emotional, intellectual, spiritual, and financial well being.

A point of practical note is that many employers complain that new hires often lack a creative ability to use the right-side of the brain to problem solve solo or in teams. This supports the point I made earlier about most high school and college grads lacking critical, creative, intuitive thinking skills, those skills that are little paid attention to by educators.

But how exactly does one go about being creative?

Practice, of course. You have to get back to being a child, those kids who say the craziest things. In the 40s, 50s and 60s the show, Art Linkletter’s House Party ran a segment called Kids Say the Darndest Things. Bill Cosby revived a version of the show in the 90s. You can see its popularity. But why?

Well, kids are cute, of course. But they are funny and damn creative. Once while talking to a friend of mine, her five-year-old daughter out of the blue asked, “Mom, when I die, will I dream of dinosaurs?” We all have the ability to think creatively to think as a child, but we have to practice being open enough and feeling safe enough to make odd connections to be flexible, tolerant and open minded. It is here and only here where one can create. And in this day and age of the consultant, the entrepreneur, the recommendation age, according to Glen Dietzel, one more than ever needs to create and be creative. With the economy being so turbulent just relying on a single source of income or job is suicide. Now more than ever one needs to branch out to secure multiple sources of income so that when one stream dries up in these turbulent time there are others to replace them. And it is here where creative, critical, intuitive thinking is vital to one’s survival.

Intuitive Thinking:

This is knowledge or belief obtained neither by reason nor perception, creativity’s cousin. It is based in instinct, a gut feeling and not one based in thorough, in depth analysis and research. It is a hunch or unjustified belief. But according to many it is one of the most important skills to the successful in any venture.

Consider the following, Dr. Mohammed Abdulla El-Erian, CEO and co-CIO of PIMCO, the world’s largest bond investor over US$1 trillion in assets, speaks to the importance of intuition. In his book, When Markets Collides, he mentions that while training as a stock broker, he was working with a very talented young man. As far as his ability is concerned, he was certainly book smart; however, according to El-Erian he was exceptional because of his intuitive insights. El Erian goes on to speak of the great importance of this acquired skill in analyzing the stock market that it is a skill the best master.

Enough from me, let’s cut to the chase by hearing what others have to say about the importance of intuition:

“All perceiving is also thinking all reasoning is also intuition, all observation is also invention” Rudolf Arnheim

“An absolute can only be given in an intuition, while all the rest has to do with analysis” Henri Bergson

“Cease trying to work everything out with your minds. It will get you nowhere. Live by intuition and inspiration and let your whole life be Revelation” Eileen Caddy

“Good design begins with honesty, asks tough questions, comes from collaboration and from trusting your intuition” Freeman Thomas

“Intuition becomes increasingly valuable in the new information society precisely because there is so much data” John Naisbitt

“All human knowledge thus begins with intuitions, proceeds thence to concepts, and ends with ideas” Immanuel Kant

“Trust your hunches. They’re usually based on facts filed away just below the conscious level” Joyce Brothers

“If the single man plant himself indomitably on his instincts, and there abide, the huge world will come round to him” Ralph Waldo Emerson

“For whereas the mind works in possibilities, the intuitions work in actualities, and what you intuitively desire, that is possible to you. Whereas what you mentally or “consciously” desire is nine times out of ten impossible; hitch your wagon to a star, or you will just stay where you are” D H Lawrence

“Knowledge has three degrees-opinion, science, illumination. The means or instrument of the first is sense; of the second, dialectic; of the third, intuition” Plontinus

“The only real valuable thing is intuition” Albert Einstein

And on Mr. Einstein’s note I end.

So putting it all together, you can’t have one without the other: critical, creative, and intuitive thinking. Creative thinking is about coming up with possibilities. Critical thinking sets the mind to discipline and accuracy. And then when our efforts are exhausted and infinite ignorance takes precedence, it is our invaluable friend intuition, the “only real valuable thing” that makes things absolute.

Develop it. Trust in it. With work, discipline, and faith it will not lead you astray. My rational mind has failed me, but the trumping power of intuition never does. Rely on it for its vision is absolute. But trust not, faith not, it will run from you as quickly as the wild wind.

Here’s to your success.

Self Improvement Tip: Be Bigger Than Your Problems: If You’re Offended, it’s Mostly Your Fault

I once asked my students what they would do if someone said that they were stupid. Most said they would be outraged, some said they would take the matter into their own hands, literally. A few said that they would do nothing. I asked why. Some said they didn’t want a confrontation that it wasn’t worth it. One student out of thirty said that she wouldn’t get upset at all. I asked her why. She said, “Well, that’s obvious. It’s just not true.”

And therein lies the strength of the power of self-control. In this day-n-age of express-yourself-no-fear-me-firtism, it is difficult if not impossible to get this concept over to people of such a mindset. But self-control is at the root of the establishment of this country. Even in our anthem “America the Beautiful” we here these prophetic words:

But we have not maintained this ideal and it has hurt us as a nation and individually. It is something that has been spoken to again and again over the decades since establishment. Here’s a current message from the pastoral staff at Westminster Presbyterian Church in Medford Oregon that speaks to this verse:

Because of this lack of self-control, even our courts have been affected by it in setting precedents that enable the uncontrolled. In one case, a 79-year-old woman burned herself with coffee that was bought at McDonalds and was awarded $640,000. Applying the principles of comparative negligence, the jury found that McDonald’s was 80% responsible for the incident and the woman was 20% at fault. Though there was a warning on the coffee cup, the jury decided that the warning was neither large enough nor sufficient [emphasis added]. In looking at the statement emphasized, one can see by this precedent where our country is headed. Most would know or be accountable or responsible enough to know that the coffee was hot whether it was 190 degrees (the actual temperature) or 140 degrees (the proposed temperature) and could cause serious pain if not serious burning.

Never before have cases of a similar nature been heard in such great numbers. Now, because of a systemic lack of accountability stemming from a lack of self-control or that which requires one to be “exercising the discipline” thereof, we have more and more become a nation of finger pointers, and those fingers very rarely if ever point backwards.

In the field of self-improvement or self-help, one often hears of overcoming weaknesses and shortcomings. Offense is a big one. Certainly we can all become offended. But the point here is that if you are too easily offended, you will spend a great majority of your time heading nowhere or, worse yet, going backwards as you spin your wheels in anger, resentment, revenge, and spite for those who have done you wrong.

There are different ways in which one may be attacked. Someone could slander or liable your good name, but if your name is good, what’s to worry? Time and time and time again, we find those who speak the loudest about the ills of others eventually shoot themselves down. I can think of two well-known performers whose act was built on attacking the character of others: Dice Clay and Joan Rivers. Their popularity was short lived. This mindset is not healthy to the individual purporting it or to those on the receiving end. It creates much more harm than good in any situation.

I can tell you of several personal experiences where people who desired to besmirch my name were not able to do so only to have it backfire because the people involved knew me or found out who was actually culpable.

If you want to do something with your life, if you want greater self confidence, less anxiety, and greater spirituality, if you want to do good for yourself and others, if you want to move ahead you need to solidify your character to build self confidence and self esteem by not letting others take cheap shots to take you down, waste your time or hold you back from growth and the opportunity to help not only yourself but others to a greater and greater degree as you overcome weaknesses. If you work on yourself, helping yourself to be good, to do good, to help others, to come to the aid of others, to lift and support others, you will create such a solid footing for yourself that those who take shots will not be able to take you down.

“I am rubber, you are glue. Whatever you say bounces off me and sticks to you.”

It may appear childish, but this motivational phrase actually works well at helping the child build self confidence to know that the source of the bad is not in her and that she is good, but most importantly, that the good in her will shine on to aid her in overcoming challenges or the negative and bad that will stick and stain and drain her of life if she believes in the insult, the lie coming her way. This is certainly not where any of us desire to be: young to old.

In order to not be offended, the majority of the work has to be done on your part. You certainly have to build yourself up in the manor suggested above, but it also takes a concerted personal mental effort to overcome the habit of emotionally attacking the offender as well. We have to think before we act. Emotions are not thoughts, they are habits put in place by years of poor or inadequate thinking / reasoning or even its complete lack. This poor reasoning must be undone by good, healthy productive reasoning, for in most cases if not all these bad habits will persist until we consciously intervene.

We can also seek the help of others by informing family and friends of our new mindset. By doing so, we not only bring them to our aid in overcoming bad habits but we help them to overcome them as well.

May you seek the good, the productive, the positive in all that you do in seeking greater self improvement, personal development and self worth. We are not here seeking perfection, nor should anyone believe that we can go throughout life without being offended, for we all have our weak moments, even the strongest. But we must desire to not find offense, to have the negative bounce off us the majority of time; therefore, we can only get stronger for ourselves and, even more importantly, for the many brothers and sisters who need lifting and strengthening. By doing all that is suggested here, you will gain confidence and improvement through these simple self-help techniques.

Personal growth and development are ongoing and never-ending. Until you’ve perfected yourself, you need to grow. Overcoming the self by making the self bigger than your problem or offender will motivate you, and through this motivation, this self improvement, this overcoming, you will gain greater and greater personal strength and desire to reach out to others to do the same for them. Strength breeding strength breeding strength breeding strength. May the line never be broken.